Feeling like you fit in online
For ages, years even, I felt quite out of the ‘inner blogging circle’; an eager but somewhat lost participant desperate to fit in. I’ve been blogging now for eight years but I’ve never felt worthy or cool enough to approach the big boys, partly due to my fairly small and somewhat stagnant following and somewhat due to my character. I’ve never been the most confident or naturally outgoing person. Once I become comfortable with people then you’ll have a hard time getting me to shut up, but to begin with, I really have to try to put myself out there.
I’ve been working on being more outgoing for years now, the old ‘fake it till you make it’ and all. I’m not going to lie, it can be extremely nerve racking but it really does work. I’ve been told that before I started to push myself to do this, people had occasionally thought I was rude or stuck up upon first meeting me, when really I was just shy and nervous. Rather than barely engaging and hoping that no one would put the spotlight on me, I actively try to be as bubbly as I am when I know people better up front, which gets those nerves out of the way ASAP and avoids people getting the wrong impression of me.
So, after eight long years in the blogging world, I recently decided to take this technique to the digital realm and see what happened. Admittedly, it was never going to be as easy because it’s much harder to convey mood and tone through writing, but I started to actually leave that witty comment (if I do say so myself) share that piece of advice and casually interact with who I follow in the way I would do in person rather than just keeping those thoughts to myself. And low and behold...
It worked! Since putting myself out there a bit more and letting my personality shine on social media I’ve had some great conversations and a fair amount of chucklesome banter with a whole host of bloggers and influencers that I never would’ve dreamed of approaching beforehand in fear of bothering them. I still get nervous that I’ll be ignored or that my comments may be taken the wrong way (I’m known to be quite sarcastic!) but pretty much every time that I’ve said ‘fuck it’ and actually pressed send, I’ve had a positive outcome.
I’ve was once asked how I reach out and interact with others online, and it’s as simple as that. Yes, it might take a bit of courage but send that witty remark, compliment that fabulous makeup look, recommend your favourite book and you’ll be surprised at how easily you start to make meaningful connections.